What I Did On Summer Vactation
I made a collage. How cool am I? Okay, okay, 1st graders can do it, too. Whatever. From the top left, going clockwise: 1) watching the game; 2) we actually DID play softball while there; 3) action shot in the field!; 4) hanging by the pool with Madekin China, our temporary mascot; 5) Awesome Monkey temps; 6) my 50 Cent dance partner and friends; 7) hangin' outside the rooms until that old witch yelled at us; 8) Monkey couple; 9) laundry day...my, aren't we organized...Literary scenes from a town called Po-Way. The names have been changed to protect the inebriated. This was a group project. Contributors include:
Brrrr (Head Writer) ; Queen of the Po-Titties ; Mama the Hip-Hop Diva ; Big Poppa ; Cargo Shorts ; Girlfriend of Cargo Shorts (GoCS) ; Princess Cherry Indigo (Editor in Chief)
OBSERVATIONS & GENERAL INFO:
- The story of the stork comes from old Lithuanian folklore AND (I kept researching this) in Western culture during Victorian times, when children would ask their parents “where did I come from” … parents would come up with ways to avoid talking about sex by making up stories. Being delivered by a stork was the most common answer to the children’s curiosity.
- No matter how hot it is outside, or how fast she runs, Cherry’s hair doesn’t move.
- Mama has been able to ascertain precisely why she is a lesbian… it relates to eating chocolate bars without nuts as a child.
- GoCS seemed surprised that nearly every lesbian she saw last week was wearing cargo shorts.
- Brrrr noticed that when lesbians weren’t wearing cargo shorts, they were wearing UnderArmor.
- Mama laughs uncontrollably when she sees pineapple.
- Brrrr wants to make t-shirts that say “I Eat Pineapple”
- There is such a stark contrast between the parts of the Queen's body that have been exposed to sun and those parts that haven’t, that it looks like she’s wearing a bikini top when she’s totally naked.
- Mama took a dump in everyone’s bathroom and figured out that Brrrrr & Cherry’s room had the best flush. She didn’t light a match afterwards.
- Two-tone Chardonnay is a blend of two different wines in your glass…not two different colors.
- Radiation Laser Tag: Play at your own risk
- If you put two quarters on the floor so you can dance around them during 50 Cent songs, Mama might try to sneak them right off the floor.
AlBERTO’S… THE DRIVE-THRU TACO STAND THAT LOOKS LIKE A BARN
- The menu board suggests that the plural of egg is EGG’S with an apostrophe-S… not just a regular S slapped on the end of the word. Hmmm.
- Also, their soft drink options include Coke, Diet Coke, and ESPRITE
- And how about that tip jar on the ledge of the drive-up window??? Brilliant, yes? If I had it to do over again, I would totally put a tip jar out on the ledge when I worked the drive-thru at Golden Fried Chicken in high school.
NAME CHANGES:
- GoCS calls Pinot Grigio PINOT GEORGIO
- Cherry calls Rancho Penasquitos Parkway (near our hotel in Poway) RANCHO MOSQUITOS PKWY
- We all pronounce Poway /PO-Way/ …but apparently it is supposed to be pronounced /POW-WAY/… we don’t care.
- We are all “Po-Didddys” now… and each of us shall begin referring to our personal diddy bag as a PO-DIDDY BAG.
- If you are “jones-ing” for something, it means you have a “hankering” or a “craving” or a desire for something.
- If you are “fixin” to do something, it means you aren’t really doing anything YET, but you are getting ready to do something soon.
ONE LINERS:
- Mama needs some shade… Mama needs to sit down… Mama needs food… Mama needs…fill in the blank.
- I think I just farted.
- I think Luke just farted.
- Back off ladies… she’s all mine!
- I’m going to pee myself.
- Can you not see how dead that horse is?
- Is there beer in your fridge?
- My drink is broken
- Gav, pull over, I have to puke
- I’m fixin’ to fart.
- Porchelin tires.
- Quick, give me my inhaler
- Marcia Brady, Mar-Mar-cia Brady.... (Courtesy of Moxie Cheerleaders)
- Fly, Monkeys, Fly…
- This shit is bananas
posted by Cherry Indigo (Cindy) @ 8/24/2005 10:31:00 PM
1 Comments:
Great collage, even if there aren't any pics of me. ;) Poway was SO MUCH FUN!! Oh yah, and so was San Diego and the Softball World Series.
I'm headed out tomorrow to buy UnderArmour. I already have everything else: cargo shorts and pineapple. My life will soon be complete.
Brrr
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