Fortune Cookie Monster
I was all set to post something about my week in Poway OR air travel. However, I couldn't resist writing this instead for 2 reasons:1. I have a working list of things that come to mind that I want to blog about. One of the things on there - for real - is fortune cookies and how they really aren't always fortunes.
2. Iced Tea NOT Coke then mentioned something exactly like this in her most recent post. I'm calling it kismit (I was going to call it Dave) and decided I had to write about this subject first, in order to make it timely with ITNC.
ITNC said that her fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I think when I first read it, I thought she meant that there was a slip of paper in it but it was just a statement of fact, not a fortune…which happens more and more often from what I can surmise. I now think that there was no slip of paper in it at all and I can’t call that kismet or Dave….just freaky.
Since I missed SO much last week, I think I'll post twice this evening and let the air travel rant escape from that literary prison called Drafts. For now...onto non-fortune cookies. I looked up 'fortune' in the dictionary. Look out! Incoming tangent!!!
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I LOVE my dictionary! If it weren't so bizarre, I would just read the dictionary. And for as much as I love my dictionary I love my thesaurus even more (btw - there is no synonym for thesaurus or synonym). I think a thesaurus might be the best reference book ever created. I use mine constantly.
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Okay...the New Oxford Dictionary (sorry, Mr. Webster is in my office at work), defines "fortune" as: n. chance or luck as an external, arbitrary force affecting human affairs. The thesaurus also uses the terms "accident, coincidence, contingency, serendipity, providence" and several iterations of chance (happy chance, mere chance, Sir Chancelot - is that a rap group?).
A fortune cookie is defined as: n. a thin folded cookie containing a slip of paper with a prediction or motto written on it, served in Chinese restaurants.
To be honest, I don’t get the motto part…is that like “Bounty, the quicker, picker-upper”? Or “Live long and prosper”? If anyone gets a motto in their fortune cookie, I'd like to hear about it.
Some REAL fortunes I have received in the past include:
"You will be unusually successful in business."
"You will travel to many places."
"You can prosper in the field of medical research."
"A hot, funny, intelligent woman is a certainty in your future." (Yeah, I made that one up but I'm pretty confident about it anyway.)
I like these fortunes, I’ve kept them. They are REAL fortunes…they predict chance, coincidence, luck, serendipity, etc. There is not a motto amongst them, however, and I’m okay with that. Quite frankly, if I opened up a fortune cookie and the slip of paper said “Semper Fidelis”, I’d be a little scared.
Here are some examples of non-fortunes that I’ve received:
“Your mentality is alert, practical and analytical.”
“You are a person of culture.”
“Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.”
“You are a hot, funny, intelligent woman with a future.” (Isn’t that WEIRD that I got something like that twice? Yeah, I thought so, too.)
Whilst these non-fortunes are DEAD ON in their descriptions, they are not, in fact, fortunes. I can’t believe that the universe has indeed run out of predictions for individuals of the human race - so I am forced to deduce that the fortune cookie manufacturers don’t understand what a fortune is or they are just lazy.
I found this manufacturer online. http://www.wontonfood.com/ You can actually order your custom fortune cookies…what has the world come to?
If you are interested in the history of the fortune cookie, look here. http://www.infoplease.com/spot/fortunecookies.html I’ll warn you, though, it’s not as exciting as you might think….but it is slightly interesting.
I don’t know what to tell ITNC. I think I would start carrying a back-up cookie for such emergencies.
posted by Cherry Indigo (Cindy) @ 8/22/2005 08:11:00 PM
1 Comments:
I did not know about the crap load of people. (BTW - I can't find "crap load" in the dictionary or thesaurus.)
I think you would be great in the fortune cookie writing business....I would call it Reality Bites. "Real Fortunes for a Real World". (Make sure you put that motto into one of the cookies. )
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